Owning Year Six
I had a lot of fears in comedy. Bombing (or people not getting the joke), not getting likes (on Facebook or in person), even friends that say they’ll come see you (because it means they won’t). Ever watch a showcase on Comedy Central like Premium Blend or A Night At Catch A Rising Starbecause you see names like Silverman and C.K. under the description? Then fast forward thru some random comic because you want to see a young Chris Rock? That’s another fear. Me being that random.
I went from trying too hard and not enough to maybe I should do homework (year 1) to cole mining. No shortcuts or flashlight. Just a shovel (year 2) to when I was on stage, I compared it to spinning plates. I was doing the act, feeling out the room, thinking on the fly with crowd work or reorganizing jokes, and hearing myself think while the spotlight was on me (year 3) to hosting and producing a weekly comedy show. Creating a show for paying regulars that attend every Monday night for over a year (year 4) to stopped caring about the act but wanting the regulars to have a good time or at least stay and pay attention (year 5). Bombing isn’t so bad. Neither is people that don’t like your posts or me in real life and people still walk past me or reintroduce themselves like they forgot we met.
Most people wear something inspirational about not fearing, be yourself, or selling themselves short with “I’m the next big thing” and hide behind how they really think about themselves. Year six is me putting myself out there. When I was getting away with saying things at open mic nights and not documenting anything, it’s time I take ownership. I’m not running for office, just want to be accountable and put out content for people to laugh. Even when it’s painful for me.
Where did this confidence come from? The confidence is always in us. We dance by ourselves and have hip hop names. Sometimes it takes being alone in a dark room for it to come out. I dressed up in my Superman costume and posed for a polaroid. My grandmother asked, I did it, don’t know why. With a little attitude change and support from my friends, I’m sharing moments.
My only advice is: Get better by accepting any situation as a challenge and a experience. The more experience you experience, the better you are at handling situations. I’m not the most popular or have the most friends. All I can control is how I treat them and how hard I work at something. A good attitude and hard work will only get you so far. Sometimes when someone tells you no it’s time to kick down your own doors. Own 2016. Whatever you put out there. Own it.